Friday, March 12, 2010

March 12, 1979

~ I know that the topic of a loss of a loved one makes some people very uncomfortable and I completely understand that.  Until a few years ago, I would also be uncomfortable around someone who had suffered a loss because I never knew what to say.  I have found out that you really don’t have to say anything.  Just listen to the person and love & pray for them.  They need to remember.  Because even though the person no longer lives on this earth, he or she will live forever in the memory of his or her loved ones.  So today, I remember my little brother Scott on what would have been his 31st birthday.~

I awoke on March 12, 1979 to a surprise.  What was usually a morning greeting  from my dad by way of music from his imaginary hand bugle <yes, annoying> was a quiet greeting from my grandma.  She had come to my house because my mom had had a baby.  For months, I had been anticipating this new baby and I was sure it was going to be the little sister I had always wanted!  I was quite shocked and disappointed when I was told that it was a boy.

A boy!?  What was I going to do with a boy?

But that little boy sure did change my life…

Scott 1

For almost eight years, I had been the only child and I was SPOILED.  Yes, I’ll admit it.

  One way he changed my life was that I now had to think of someone besides me!  ;0) And everyone else did too, for that matter. 

I will never forget the day that he came home.  He was red – his hair & his skin – but he was kind of cute.  I begged to hold him and feed him.  My mom let me and I rocked him as I fed him.  He then proceeded to show me the contents of the entire bottle again – all over me!  I thought that I had rocked him too hard but we soon found out that he was allergic to milk.  However, I never would rock and feed him at the same time again…just to be sure. 

Another way he changed my life was I learned how to be gentle.

Scott 3

He had the most splendid red hair you have probably ever seen.  And everywhere we went, he would get A LOT of attention.  You see, my parents are brunettes and I am a blonde so we were quite a mixture and people always questioned and adored his red hair.  It made me jealous at first but I soon became proud of him.

  He changed me by teaching me to put others first.

*Let me stop here to say:  I love my brother (in case it sounds like I don’t).   And I know above I sound a bit…self-absorbed.  Well, I’m human and I do have my days of self-absorption…

Scott and Age

One of my fondest memories is of our trip to Florida.  We left as soon as I came in the door from cheerleading camp and I was tired.  I was trying to sleep on the way to Florida but someone <Scott> kept messing with me to wake me up and then he would giggle.  It annoyed me but I knew he was showing me that he loved me. 

 He changed me because he showed me  the love of a brother that is always there when love from others has failed.

Scott 2He loved the outdoors but the sun sure did not love him.  Or maybe it loved him a bit too much.  We always joked about who had the darker skin.  I would tell him that he was just “one big freckle”.  He supplied my family with deer meat many times and he taught me about trees & nature.  I can not walk out into the woods without thinking of him and I now love trees and can identify many of them.

He changed me because he taught me how to slow down and see the beauty in God’s world.


This picture was taken the last day that I saw my brother here on earth.  You might notice as you look at the picture, a bunch of boring “conservative type” people with one who definitely stands out due to his “dress”.  That was Scott…he definitely was not afraid to be himself.  That’s what I think people really liked about him.  What you saw was what you got.  And that’s how he treated you too.  He took each person at face value.  He accepted you just like you were. 

Scott changed me because he taught me that it’s ok to be yourself even if you’re “different”.  He taught me how to love other people for who they are and not for what I wanted them to be.

I miss my brother.  But I know that I will see him again.  I remember that he professed Jesus Christ as his Savior when he was younger.  My Father God assures me that nothing can snatch me or my brother from His hand (John 10:28).  So I rest in the promise that I will reunite with Scott when I close my eyes here on earth.  And maybe we will greet each other in our customary way -  something like this:

“Hey, Little Brother,” says the 5’3” big sister as she looks up to her brother.

“Hey, Big Sister,” says the over 6 foot little brother in a somewhat sarcastic tone as he looks down upon his short sister.

~In loving memory of Scott Christopher~

March 12, 1979 – December 7, 2005






  1. what a beautiful post. hugs, mariann

  2. Thank you for this beautiful post!!! So proud to call you friend. Maybe one day I'll be able to be as elegant in speech about my own loss. Though the circumstance of loss unites us in more ways than I ever could have imagined, I'm glad to have YOU to walk on this journey with me. ((((HUGS)))) and loads of love to you today and always!! ;)


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